I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Randomize
