The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Randomize
