I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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