it hurts more in the daytime
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Randomize
