I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
