I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
Randomize
