You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
I love having hate sex.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Randomize
