just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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