Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
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