butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
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