you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Randomize
