Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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