i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
nutella sex= disaster
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
