This girl is more easily done than said...
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
