i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Randomize