sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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