I hate your face
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I didn't notice because vodka
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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