Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
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