god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
