hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Please don't give away my fajitas
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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