whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
I can't trust your balls anymore.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
