At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
