i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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