I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Randomize
