I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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