where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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