I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
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