Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
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