I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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