If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
