your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
