oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
