Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
People with herpes should wear stickers.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
