the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
