Cold hands, warm shart.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
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