Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
You made out with two different species that night
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
