he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
