My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
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Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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