Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
