U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
