Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
