I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
You're earring is so big in my mouth
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
My vagina just clenched in fear
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize