there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Randomize
