Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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