yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Randomize
