I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
where are you?
Hypothermia
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Randomize
