Your face is a jimmy john
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
