either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
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