All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Randomize
