Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
